Ask Jay: How Do I Let Go?

About this episode

In the very first episode of Ask Jay, a new series where listeners send in voice notes with their biggest questions, Jay explores what it really means to let go when your heart is still holding on. Through four deeply personal stories, he unpacks the difference between love and trauma bonds, the pull of breadcrumbing and relationship amnesia, the anxious-avoidant cycle, and what it takes to rebuild trust after betrayal. Along the way, Jay shares practical tools to help you choose yourself, rebuild self-trust, accept silence as an answer, and recognize when healing needs to come before making a decision about a relationship. With Love and Gratitude, Jay Shetty PURPOSE10 for 10% at altrarunning.com⁠/onpurpose. Free Shipping and Free 30-Day Trial. Your future is waiting, and Walden is here to help you achieve it. https://WaldenU.edu Access resources from the Domestic Violence support hotline here: https://www.thehotline.org/ JAY’S DAILY WISDOM DELIVERED STRAIGHT TO YOUR INBOX Join 900,000+ readers discovering how small daily shifts create big life change with my free newsletter. Subscribe here: https://news.jayshetty.me/subscribe Check out our Apple subscription to unlock bonus content of On Purpose! https://lnk.to/JayShettyPodcast What We Discuss: 00:00 Introduction 01:23 Are You Holding On To A One-Sided Relationship? 03:40 The Law of Reciprocation 06:23 Breadcrumbing And Listening to Your Body 07:34 Trauma Bonds And Relationship Amnesia 09:16 Letting Go Of The “Good Girl” Persona 11:04 Is It Love or A Trauma Bond? 16:07 Why Toxic Relationships Feel So Hard to Leave 16:41 Rebuilding Self-Trust After Abuse 19:11 The Love As Action Test 20:12 Why Avoidant Partners Leave 21:52 What An Avoidant Partner May Be Thinking 23:32 Stop Trying To Read Their Mind 25:38 Redirecting Hope Back Toward Yourself 29:21 Can Trust Be Rebuilt After Betrayal? 31:00 What Was the Purpose Of The Break? 32:58 Should You Give Second Chances? 33:39 Healing Before Making A Relationship Decision 34:36 Building A “Second Marriage” With The Same Person Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices