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That Feeling of "Always-Behind and Never-Enough"—Here's the Antidote | Ellen Hendriksen

That Feeling of "Always-Behind and Never-Enough"—Here's the Antidote | Ellen Hendriksen

10% Happier with Dan Harris
24 jul 2026 1h 6m
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<p dir="ltr">Move on from the inner critic and beat perfectionism without lowering your standards.</p> <p dir="ltr"><a href="https://www.ellenhendriksen.com/">Dr. Ellen Hendriksen</a> is a clinical psychologist who helps people calm their anxiety and be their authentic self. She serves on the faculty at Boston University's Center for Anxiety and Related Disorders (CARD) and is the author of <a href= "https://static.macmillan.com/static/smp/how-to-be-enough-9781250291875/"> HOW TO BE ENOUGH: Self-Acceptance for Self-Critics and Perfectionists</a> and <a href= "https://www.amazon.com/How-Be-Yourself-Critic-Anxiety/dp/1250161703"> HOW TO BE YOURSELF: Quiet Your Inner Critic and Rise Above Social Anxiety</a>. You can find her on Substack at <a href= "https://substack.com/@ellenhendriksen">How to Be Good to Yourself When You're Hard on Yourself</a>. This episode originally aired in 2025. </p> <p dir="ltr">In this episode we talk about:</p> <ul> <li dir="ltr" role="presentation">The relationship between perfectionism and anxiety</li> <li dir="ltr" role="presentation">The definition of perfectionism––and why the word is actually a misnomer</li> <li dir="ltr" role="presentation">Dr. Hendriksen's own struggles with perfectionism, and how they manifested physically</li> <li dir="ltr" role="presentation">The difference between healthy perfectionism and unhealthy perfectionism</li> <li dir="ltr" role="presentation">Changing your relationship with your inner critic </li> <li dir="ltr" role="presentation">Shifting from rigid rules to flexibility</li> <li dir="ltr" role="presentation">Keeping high standards while making room for mistakes</li> <li dir="ltr" role="presentation">Overcoming procrastination</li> <li dir="ltr" role="presentation">Navigating social comparison</li> <li dir="ltr" role="presentation">And much more<strong><br /></strong></li> </ul> <p dir="ltr">Related Episodes:</p> <ul> <li dir="ltr" role="presentation"><a href= "https://www.danharris.com/p/strategies-for-social-anxiety-ellen-35c?utm_source=publication-search"> Strategies for Social Anxiety | Ellen Hendriksen</a></li> <li dir="ltr" role="presentation"><a href= "https://www.danharris.com/p/the-voice-in-your-head-ethan-kross-495?utm_source=publication-search"> The Voice in Your Head | Ethan Kross </a></li> <li dir="ltr" role="presentation"><a href= "https://www.danharris.com/p/how-to-move-into-the-future-with-3a4?utm_source=publication-search"> How To Move Into The Future With Optimism Instead Of Anxiety | Frederik Pferdt</a></li> </ul> <p dir="ltr">Get the 10% with Dan Harris app <a href= "https://app.danharris.com/membership">here</a></p> <p dir="ltr">Sign up for Dan's free newsletter <a href= "http://www.danharris.com/">here</a></p> <p dir="ltr">Follow Dan on social: <a href= "https://bit.ly/3tGigG5">Instagram</a>, <a href= "https://bit.ly/3FOA84J">TikTok</a></p> <p dir="ltr">Subscribe to our <a href= "https://bit.ly/3FybRzD">YouTube Channel</a></p> <p dir="ltr">Join Dan, Sebene Selassie, and Jeff Warren for Meditation Party, a 3-day immersive retreat at the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY, October 16–18. Grab your in-person spot <a href= "https://www.eomega.org/workshops/meditation-party">here</a>, or sign up to livestream <a href= "https://www.eomega.org/workshops/meditation-party-livestream">here</a>!<br /> <br /> To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit <a href= "https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris">https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris</a></p>

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